Saturday, March 28, 2009

Prostate's Good

Last night, I spoke to my dad's friend who has a hospital and asked him for a urologist. He told me to go to his hospital today. I got there at nine in the morning and he had already left. Over the phone the doctor told me to come to his clinic on the other side of Baghdad but a couple hours later I figured that I didn't have the time to go all the way over there. So I headed to a local street where lots of doctors are to be found and picked the first urologist I found. His sign was new, so I guessed that he probably was a doctor that returned as a result of the improved situation. In his office he still hadn't finished hanging all his plaques.

I explained to him that my penis was leaking something watery and he asked me if I had been 'naughty'. I told him I had 7 weeks ago. He then got me on the bed, felt around my tummy, took a look at my willy and gave it a painful squeeze. Then he told me to turn over, so I lied down on my tummy but he wanted me to lift myself on my elbows. That's when I saw him put some cream on his glove. He told me to look forward and he inserted his finger into my bum. He asked me if I felt something was pushing out and yes it did feel so. My prostate's good he said. He then gave me a piece of paper to take to the lab to get a urine test and if necessary cultures.

Walking down from his office I spotted a friend from college. He asked me how I was doing, I told him I got fingered! It then turns out that the doctor was his dad who had been abroad and was suffering from cancer, but is now nearly recovered. I did my pipi test and didn't end up having to do any cultures. The doctor prescribed me some antibiotics and told me to come back in ten days. And I've got no idea what's wrong with me.

Oh no! I'm on antibiotics which means I can't drink up anymore! Good thing I got well wasted last night.

Later this evening, my dad took me to that 'lady of society' that I've mentioned before. She had found me a 'suitable' woman and we were all invited at her house. The girl was not especially pretty and certainly didn't know how to do her hair nor how to dress in this century. I spoke to the lady outside and told her that she looks a bit heavy to which she responded with you can't have it all good to which I replied that I worry about my back. It went pretty well, dad kept his cool for once and didn't bring up the 'marriage' subject out loud. The evening passed and I didn't exchange a single word with her, but I still had fun conversing with everyone else present.

On the way back home, dad insisted on giving his opinion and that included the fact that the girl was nearly two years older than me which I guess explained why he didn't jump the gun this time. I'm ready to give up on my dad's help now. I'm thinking I'm better off focusing on my work for the mean time and then make a drastic life change so I can meet more women.

Friday, March 27, 2009

In abu nawas


Arrived in Baghdad a few hours ago and now sitting with od in an abu nawas 'cabaret' thing: has an iraqi band with the speakers playing very loud, an all-male clientele and a small bunch of female iraqi dancers.
I just had the most excruciating whizz of my life by the river. The pain from my kidneys was incredible. I've been having trouble with my willy for the past couple of days, it's constantly leaking. I didn't find any labs open earlier with od but tomorrow i'm going to see if i can find a willy doctor at my dad's friend's hospital.
Od says it sucks for the iraqis not in iraq.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

No Power and maybe No Water

Hello! It's been a long time since I've done this. Not much point in starting since I don't have much battery charge left in the laptop and the generator here in Shamiya isn't working. Both generators don't work actually. The house generator and the rice mill generator. Should get a new mill generator tomorrow but still need to shop for one for the house.

My dad's still here in Iraq, but yesterday I left him behind in Baghdad since he had some work to do there. It's the first time I'm away from him since he arrived and I slept so well last night. I dreamed of a blond with the most amazing naked body asking me why was I having trouble getting it up.

Whilst working on some paper work, my dad introduced me to the niece of the managing director of the government office we were at. That was about ten days ago, and up until a couple of days the girl would insist that we talk every night on the phone. I'd be barely awake and talk with her for a rather boring hour. [power cut..] Just spoke to her now though. Now I told dad that after speaking to her that she's not right for me, and he told me that I have to break it off with her, but I just don't know how to without hurting her feelings. I know, it's better to deal with it sooner than later, but I do keep throwing suggestions that I'm not interested.

I'm a little wasted on Tequila now, and have just had some dinner: a chicken stuffed pastry thing and some imported Turkish doner kebab. There's a severe water shortage apparently, and because of it we might not be allowed to grow rice in the next season. Fozzy tells me heard that Iraq might strike a deal with Turkey for water in exchange for 5% of Iraq's oil production. My dad tells me that the Turk's argument for not giving us more water is that as long as water is flowing from Iraq into the sea that Iraq then has no right to ask for more water.

That's it, I'm going to hit the sack.