Sunday, March 25, 2007

Blast From My Ass

Got diarrhea once again. Haven't had it in ages. Maybe it's because today I stopped taking those antibiotics I started taking last month. Or maybe my lunch at that restaurant was dodgy. I always have tummy problems after eating there. Last night it looked like that zit on the inside of my thigh was about ready to pop. Now it looks like it's just going to disappointingly fade away.

Miz came back from Egypt. He stayed at Kala's place. He was supposed to buy an apartment for his parents and his little brother to move into. But after arriving there with his brother his parents told him that they had changed their minds. That certainly pissed off Miz. And so Miz came back with his little brother that he was supposed to leave behind had he bought a flat.

I slept over at Miz's place last week end. Before leaving, India had fortune of spending a sleep over at Miz's. I remember India telling me it was a dreadful experience, but I just couldn't for the life of me remember why exactly. His parents moved abroad a couple of years ago and the place was the filthy. But everything was fine until I needed to take a crap.

Turned out Miz doesn't have a toilet seat in his house, instead he's got a traditional hole in the ground. I'm not accustomed to the hole in the ground thing and I re-discovered that it does require some skill and dexterity. The other surprise was that Miz doesn't have any running water in his house except for a weak running tap in the garden.

Miz got me a bucket of water to flush with and a jug of water to wipe my ass with and left me to deal with the situation. After some mental preparation, I got to the task at hand. I pulled down my pants and squatted over the hole. The delivery was satisfying enough, even though I was sure if I was on a real toilet I could've probably pushed out a bit more. But then I had to wipe my ass with the water jug and it was too heavy for me to pour onto my backside without losing balance. And I noticed how very dangerously close my linen trousers were to the hole and the likelihood of some of the water flowing off my backside could drip on it. So I took off my trousers and then proceeded to wipe my ass successfully. Put my trousers back on and called Miz to show me how to wash my hands, he showed me the tap in the garden and the ordeal was over with.

Enie and Zaif, both of whom had left to Syria during the summer came this past week. I saw Enie at college today and I've yet to see Zaif. It's good to have Enie back in the class, he's much more alive than the rest of the guys. When Zaif arrived I spoke to him on the phone and he explained to me how he and his friends are planning to rent a place near his uni since his neighbourhood is too dangerous to commute from on a daily basis. He's a bit worried that it might be considered suspicious for a bunch of guys rent a place together. I knew my cousin was planning to do the same thing, so I told him that there must be a lot of guys doing the same and so it shouldn't be that suspicious. I know he knows my cousin, so I tried to tell him that he could maybe find a place with him. Zaif then connected some dots and realised that one of the friends with whom he's trying to find a place with is my cousin.

My bro who quit smoking just a few weeks ago has found out that he's got diabetes. It was my dad who also has diabetes that figured it out when he caught my bro pissing a lot. He's so bummed out about it. The doctor told him he has to lose ten kilos if he wants to fix himself up to not have to take pills or needles.

Nahida's found me an Arabic tutor (two actually) to teach me Arabic grammar. The first one was really good and he gave me two lessons which went very well. But since he's in such high demand and tutors groups, he's not affordable. So he hooked me up with another with whom I've only had one lesson so far and who inundated me with information. The second one ain't so great but I hope it works out with him anyway.

My car spent the last week being repaired by Nahida's brother. The choo-choo train sound from the engine is gone and is now making a beautiful hum. Acceleration is doing great too.

I'm still holding out against Nahida's food. I'm having lunch at restaurants and dinner has become a 'la vache qui rit' sandwich nearly everyday. I don't think I'm spending more by eating out every day, because a lot of the time I end up eating out before coming home from college anyway. And the food Nahida usually makes me is somewhat expensive and the amounts are wasteful.

I haven't had a shower for a week until this morning because the electricity has been missing that whole time. So after a week of building up a good smelly and well itchy body, and I would've gone on if I didn't have college today, I finally took a cold shower. But then after I got back from college the electricity came back for an hour or so and I just wished it had come one day earlier. But the cold shower was pretty nice, it also convinced me to use the downstairs shower next to my bedroom because the water flow is stronger. Which is exceptional because I had grown accustomed to using the upstairs one which even after I moved downstairs I continued to use. The upstairs shower has an indoor water heater but a weak water flow whereas the downstairs one is the opposite, it has an outdoor water heater which is harder to warm up and a stronger water flow making it more ideal for a cold shower.

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